Fewer and fewer people marry in marriage. One third of marriages will not survive. Divorce has a huge impact on your life and the lives of your loved ones. You have to put everything in order to save your marriage. At least as long as you continue to believe in marriage. But marital problems can also simply not be resolved.
We are happy to help you save your marriage. In this article, we explain 8 golden tips that can help you breathe new life into your relationship. They have been very happy with each other. With difficulty and attention, you can relive old times, but you have to do something about it.
Do you have marital problems or a normal male/female relationship?
In a healthy relationship, there are always differences of opinion and arguments. They are equal partners, each with their own opinion. It’s impossible to always be on a line about everything.
In a relationship where there are never any problems, there is probably a negative resignation, for example: “I’m not going to go into that anymore, because it doesn’t make sense.” There is a marital problem if it is felt by one of the two partners. As soon as the situation within the marriage makes you unhappy, action must be taken.
Try everything to save the marriage.
You enter into a marriage for life. With marital problems, you have to do everything in your power to save the marriage, unless you no longer want to stay in the marriage. Before you start jumping to conclusions, you need to be sure of your case. A divorce has a huge emotional and financial impact. Not just for you, but for the people in your life, and of course, especially family. As long as it remains worthwhile for you, you must ensure changes within your relationship.
A relationship is further deteriorated by a negative spiral.
Married couples with marital problems end up in a vicious cycle. Because of problems, even bigger problems arise. So something has to be done about the situation. Eventually, the marital problems become so great that he will no longer be able to control them. The problem is that many times the themes of the wedding are not valued. This is also logical because the line between a period where the marriage is a bit more rigid and real marital problems is blurred. You can only resolve problems after they have been acknowledged.
Is couples therapy the solution?
You only go to couples therapy if you can’t solve the problems on your own. Couples therapy doesn’t work well for everyone. Your relationship can benefit in the long run, but it can also strengthen negative thinking about your relationship. Subconsciously you will realize that now you also need therapy to keep your relationship alive. If you have to choose between divorce or couples therapy, it is, of course, an easy choice. You can try therapy as a last resort.
8 golden tips to solve marital problems
How to get out of this negative spiral? You should also let your partner think along with you. Two people are needed for a good marriage. An unlucky partner already causes marital problems for both partners. Apply the following tips to immediately implement improvements within your marriage.
Tip #1: Stop blaming and start building
There are many reproaches within a troubled marriage. Partners who want to work on their relationship must stop this. It’s okay to express what you don’t like, but don’t do it in an angry (negative) frame of mind. It is better to wait until a time when there is no mutual friction. Express what is bothering you in a non-blaming way. Stopping blame is the first step in breaking a negative spiral within your relationship. There is still a long way to go, but the first step has already been taken.
Tip #2: Find the source of the problems
There are probably more causes for your marital problems, but try to find out what is the basis of the problem. When and why did it arise? Marital problems are often the sum of multiple complications, but there can be a real problem. This can be annoyance at the relaxed attitude of one of the two, but it can also be caused by bad sex, for example. If you can figure out the probable source of the problems, it will also be easier to do something about it.
Tip #3: Also be open to your own mistakes and negative attitude
Identifying the problems with the couple probably won’t cost you much effort. The next step is to face your own disadvantages and do something about them. The degree of guilt for the problems within the relationship may differ, but both actively contribute to the problems. Put on paper where you drop the points. Ask your partner in substantive conversation about what you’re doing wrong. Do you know its disadvantages? Then do something with it.
Tip #4: Lots of conversations
Many conversations will have to take place to advance alone. Take the time for this. Don’t expect a few conversations to be enough to get back together. It’s best to schedule in-depth conversations daily or at least several times a week. Also, discuss the progress you have already made. Use the events of that day to analyze what could have gone wrong and how you can prevent it in the future.
Tip #5: Identify each other’s strengths
Cultivating goodwill together can’t hurt. They are probably often criticized. You should not expect compliments in an interrupted marriage. Try to write down your partner’s strengths. Make a list and discuss it with each other. It’s nice to hear what your partner appreciates about you. It’s mostly about the character’s strengths.
Tip #6: Go back to the beginning
It is good to feel again what you have felt for each other in the past. Take both of you back to basics to see that you’ve had some good times too. These may be pictures of better times, but another enjoyable way is to go on a vacation for two to your honeymoon destination. Even recalling memories can be very effective. The point is that you don’t just think negatively about your marriage. The common goal should be to be happy together again. To do this, you need to realize what it’s like to have fun again in a relationship.
Tip #7: Do things together
Partners who live next door to each other can take steps to do more together. For example, doing odd jobs around the house or taking a course together. We have to rebuild something in common. A feeling of “we” must be created again. This gives a connection. You should get more deals than just two people living under the same roof.
Tip #8: Give each other more space
There can also be relationship problems because they are too much on each other’s lips. In that case, you should not do things together but seek relaxation yourself. Always doing something together can be really oppressive and suffocating. Tell your partner that you want to do more of yourself. Giving each other space is different from avoiding each other. In that case, other steps must be taken to make the relationship healthy again.
The tips will only function with the full cooperation of both partners. If your partner does not want to cooperate to improve the relationship, underestimate the problem or your partner has already left the relationship.
A healthy relationship ensures a happy life. A bad relationship generates stress, accidents and a lot of drama.